Storytelling Tip: Use Scenes to Make Your Story Cinematic
When I started my career, I never felt valued. It was like my boss just didn’t care. I’d work so hard and never get anything back.
Ingrid wrote these sentences to open her story. There’s nothing wrong with her choice here. The words offer the listener some context and provide a basic understanding of how the protagonist felt at the time. But the opening for her story could and should do so much more, especially if she’s crafting it to make a point and influence others.
One of the most powerful things you can do throughout your story—but especially at the beginning—is to use language that allows your listener to visualize what’s happening. When your listener is able to visualize the story, it becomes more experiential to them, it’s easier to follow, it feels more tangible and authentic in its specificity and it’s easier to remember.
When we’re coaching someone to do this, we encourage them to find the scenes, to avoid generalizations, to go beyond the plot and uncover the cinematic potential within their story. Think SHOW, not TELL. So when Ingrid came to us with her story, this is exactly what we coached her to do.
Here’s a step by step process for how to do this.
1. Identify Scenes
In general, we recommend you start with at LEAST 3 scenes in a story. This may look like a scene that showcases your main character before the challenge/drama/discovery of your story, a scene that illustrates the challenge or conflict being overcome, and finally, a scene that demonstrates the change the character has experienced as an outcome of having overcome the challenge. This final scene should land the point of the story for the audience. . The “Rule of 3” is breakable (some stories can unfold entirely in a single scene!), but it’s a good starting point when you’re developing your story. In Ingrid’s case, we prompted her to recall a specific moment that would illustrate why she felt undervalued, rather than describing it in general terms. The key here is to identify actual scenes or moments that are specific rather than a general summary of a series of moments. “Starting a career” is not a scene, while “walking off the elevator on your first day of work” is a scene.
2. Flesh Each Scene Out with Specifics
Grab a set of index cards. If you only have three scenes, you’ll need three cards. On the top of each card, write the headline for one of your scenes. Then write down the time and place—when and where is the character? Be as specific as possible even if it feels like too much information. “2022, New York” is not as good as “Early November, in an office in Times Square.” On the rest of the card write down as many sensory details as you can—what does your main character see, smell, hear, taste, and feel? Ingrid wrote on one of her index cards her claustrophobia as she sat between the 4 windowless walls in her NYC apartment at 4am, the dim glow of her laptop while her husband slept in the bed beside her, and her eyes drooping with exhaustion. After noting all the sensory details, flip the card over and write down the actual events that happen during that scene, including what the character thinks and feels along the way.
3. Sequence The Scenes to Create a Story Flow
Once you have a good set of scenes in place, part of the fun of story-crafting is sequencing them. Believe it or not, chronological order is just ONE option available to you. You can also choose to start your story at the end, and flash back to the other scenes. Or you can choose to start in the middle of your story. To help you decide the best order for your scenes, consider the 4 super powers, and which sequence helps them come alive the most.
4. Write, Share and Experiment with Your Story
Once you have sequenced your scenes into a story, run your story by a trusted friend or colleague.
The first time you do this, use your index cards as references, but try not to read them exactly. Share your story using the index cards to remind you of key elements of each scene. When you’ve made it through the entire story, ask your listener for what worked about the story and what would make it more powerful.
Note the feedback you receive directly onto your index cards, and then try to put together a fully written draft. Once you know your story has scenes and will be visual and specific, it is a great idea to write the next version out with full sentences.
With a written draft, run your story by another trusted partner. Ask for feedback, and then do it again and again and again. The feedback will help you learn what you’re actually communicating (not just what you think you’re communicating) and is a great way to gain confidence and learn how to flex your story as you go.
After several iterations, this was Ingrid’s opening:
It was already 4am, but I decided to do one more pass on the slide deck before sending it off to Dean. He needed it for a presentation tomorrow, and I needed him to be impressed. Spell check, done. Check the alignment of that icon… ok, looks good. Oooh, is that blue the wrong blue? Double check that. Ok. I think it’s ready.
I looked at my husband sleeping soundly in the bed next to my desk. The blue light from my laptop cast an eerie sort of glow across his cheeks. My head was pounding from exhaustion, but 2 more minutes, and I’d allow myself to fall asleep. I pushed the send button and leaned back into my chair, feeling the aches I had been ignoring for the last 6 hours.
I rested my eyes for ten seconds, too tired to get up yet.
Ding!
A message from Dean… Already?
“You missed a period on slide 5.” That’s all it said.
My heart sank. I was never gonna be good enough…
Notice how Ingrid transformed a few context sentences into a scene that illustrates her point. It’s visual (you can instantly picture it) and specific ( you understand and can relate to what she means about not feeling valued). Now, it’s truly a story that has the potential to influence.